How do I talk to royalty?
To get a king or queen’s attention, you should say, “Your royal highness.” Do not say “Hey you there!” or “Queenie.” You may use their first name if you happen to know it (e.g. “Elizabeth”).… How do I talk to royalty?
Stopping alien expansion
Maks writes: What is the funniest way to stop the alien expansion? There are so many kinds of angry, dangerous, terrible aliens… There must be a way to prevent the expansion! Maks, you’ve correctly identified… Stopping alien expansion
What should I do if a monarch orders me beheaded?
“Off with her head!” Wow, that gets the blood racing, doesn’t it? Well, relax. Kings and queens no longer have the authority to have people beheaded. They only do this to let off steam, or… What should I do if a monarch orders me beheaded?
How can I repel mosquitoes?
Hilary Moon Murphy writes again to ask how to best repel mosquitoes. Now, my pal Socrates would leap right onto that question, but he wouldn’t answer it. Oh, no, that’s too easy. Instead he would… How can I repel mosquitoes?
How to eat a pickle
When you eat a pickle, you must stand. Never eat a pickle sitting or lying down, as you cannot effectively defend the pickle in those positions. The correct posture for pickle eating is shown here… How to eat a pickle
How do I tell the difference between cheese and soap?
A whitish-yellowish block. Could be cheese. Could be soap. How can you be sure? The answer can have definite consequences. Eating soap is unpleasant and bubbly. Cleaning yourself with cheese is ineffective, and attracts mice.… How do I tell the difference between cheese and soap?
How can I tell stories at summer camp?
Do you want to tell stories at camp? Surprisingly, the most important things you can do to insure success in story telling, begin before you start talking. First, make sure the audience can all see… How can I tell stories at summer camp?
Tyler, how can I become as knowledgeable as you are?
Hilary Moon Murphy of Minneapolis wrote to ask how I developed my expertise. I sleep on books. I’ve found that if I place a book under my pillow at night, and skim the table of… Tyler, how can I become as knowledgeable as you are?
What should I leave behind when I go to summer camp?
When they go to camp, some people bring many unnecessary things from home. Here’s a list of several items you might think you will need at camp, but you probably won’t. Dirt: most camps have… What should I leave behind when I go to summer camp?