How can I repel mosquitoes?

Yoga man

Hilary Moon Murphy writes again to ask how to best repel mosquitoes. Now, my pal Socrates would leap right onto that question, but he wouldn’t answer it. Oh, no, that’s too easy. Instead he would ask another question, to wit: Are we sure that’s the question you really want answered? Is it necessary to repel …

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How to eat a pickle

When you eat a pickle, you must stand. Never eat a pickle sitting or lying down, as you cannot effectively defend the pickle in those positions. The correct posture for pickle eating is shown here (the actual pickle is omitted to avoid undue temptation). Lean forward slightly, holding the pickle in one hand and with …

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How do I tell the difference between cheese and soap?

A whitish-yellowish block. Could be cheese. Could be soap. How can you be sure? The answer can have definite consequences. Eating soap is unpleasant and bubbly. Cleaning yourself with cheese is ineffective, and attracts mice. In these and many other ways, being able to distinguish between cheese and soap is crucial to your continued happiness. …

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How can I tell stories at summer camp?

Do you want to tell stories at camp? Surprisingly, the most important things you can do to insure success in story telling, begin before you start talking. First, make sure the audience can all see and hear you from where they are sitting. Wear a hood or mask, and plain clothing, so you cannot be …

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Tyler, how can I become as knowledgeable as you are?

Tyler absorbing knowledge

Hilary Moon Murphy of Minneapolis wrote to ask how I developed my expertise. I sleep on books. I’ve found that if I place a book under my pillow at night, and skim the table of contents the next day, I can pretend to have read it. This saves a lot of time and lets me …

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What should I leave behind when I go to summer camp?

When they go to camp, some people bring many unnecessary things from home. Here’s a list of several items you might think you will need at camp, but you probably won’t. Dirt: most camps have plenty already, and it’s free. Anvil: The camp will supply tools for craft projects. Monster Chow: some campers believe that …

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What should I bring to summer camp?

This is the time of year when parents pack their kids away to summer camp, so they can briefly recapture the freedom of being childless. As a summer camp goer, you may be wondering what critically important things you must not leave behind. Here are some camping essentials you might have forgotten. Communicator: To tell …

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On the horns of a dilemma: Jumpin’ Jack Flash vs. Red Dawn

An anonymous reader asks: If I have a choice to watch either Jumpin’ Jack Flash or Red Dawn, which mid 80s movie should I watch? I first want to point out that this is a free country, and you are not obliged to suffer through either of these movies. However, perhaps you’re in a different …

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How should I salute a royal person?

Royal Salute

Most people are unlikely to encounter any kings, queens, princes or princesses close up. However, just in case, here is what you need to know. Upon sighting a member of a royal family, give the royal salute. Touch your thumbs to your forehead and spread your other fingers like the points of a crown. Make …

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Is Cinderella a maiden?

At the beginning of the story, Cinderella is a maiden. She’s young, unmarried, and female; those are the basic requirements (some people might propose an additional rule, but I think it’s clear she meets that standard also). She’s also pretty, which doesn’t hurt. A very ugly girl might technically qualify as a maiden, but the …

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